Sunday, January 25, 2009

Houston, we have a neurotic pregnant lady.

For about two days after every doctor's appointment, I feel pretty damn good. Cookie and I have never not gotten a clean bill of health, so I have every reason to have a little bounce in my step on my walk back to the car. Hey, why not even email my friends and family pictures of the ultrasound because Cookie is DOING JUST FINE!

Then, about two days go by. The worry sets in. And then a week goes by, and it sets in deeper. The longer I go without hearing the heartbeat, the worse it gets. Even if I have no reason to believe anything is wrong, I just start to assume that something is.

I've had all these weird aches and pains in my left side and stomach for the past few days -- nothing excruciating, just a little uncomfortable. They feel very similar to the description of what's called "round ligament pain," which involves your ligaments stretching to accommodate your cantaloupe of a uterus. If that's what it is, it's a perfectly normal symptom in the second trimester of pregnancy.

But how do I know that's what it is? And on non-doctor weeks (they only schedule appointments about once a month), how am I ever going to be sure that Cookie is OK? (This is a rhetorical question, BTW.)

I do think that if something were ever reallyreally wrong, I'd probably know. I've only been dangerously ill a few times in my life, and in those instances, I knew I had to get to a doctor immediately (and my intuition was absolutely correct). Then, there were the "should I or shouldn't I?" moments where I've gone to the ER against my better judgment. Each time, I spent 15 hours in a waiting room for nothing. Apparently pregnancy consists of a LOT of those "should I or shouldn't I?" moments, and I do NOT have 15 hours each day to spend in an ER waiting room. Not to mention the fact that Blue Cross Blue Shield would be pretty pissed at me.

So, in the absence of a Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes in-home ultrasound machine, I am not quite sure how to deal with all of this. I'm looking for advice here from people who've been through this. How did you deal with the worries without driving yourself crazy?

3 comments:

Jennifer said...

I had forgotten all about the ligament pain. It is amazing, you really do forget a lot of the sucky parts later.

Anyway, it probably is just ligament pain, but my best advice is that if you are not sure about something to call your doctor. Part of the reason why Aiden and I had such a close call was because I had one of those "should I or shouldn't I" moments and I waited. The good news is that even if nothing is wrong you will get to hear the heartbeat and maybe even get another ultrasound;-)

Jennifer said...

Actually, my best advice is...clip baby's fingernails whole s/he is sleeping!! Those things are like quick moving razor blades!

The Hall said...

Reading always made me feel better. Get "What to expect..." or sign up for Babycenter.com updates. When the book/web site was describing exactly how I felt, I assumed it was normal. If I felt something that I hadn't read about, I would call my OB's office.

From here on out, I don't think the worrying every stops. Maybe you just get used to it a bit more?